Saturday, October 24, 2009

Missing you!

Today is a day that Joe and I have been looking forward too for a couple of months. Today is Ayden's two year birthday! Joe was lucky enough to get the weekend off and we are here in Oakley headed up to Ayden's grave here in about 20 minutes. There are days that I look at pictures of him and it breaks my heart that I do not have a little 2 year old running around. I wonder all the time what he would look like and the personality he would have. Joe and I have been talking a lot about what it might have been that Ayden was called back to our Heavenly Father so soon and we always finish the conversation feeling that he had a very special mission that he needed to return for. We are so greatful that we were blessed with him in our lives. We are greatful for how things happened and that we were prompted to let him leave. It has been a hard couple of years without him, but as time goes on I realize more and more that God knows us better than we do. I trust him so much and am greatful for his trust in me as a mother. I am greatful that we have something to look forward to and work towards as a family. It keeps us going each and every day. I am so greatful for my husband and the support that he gives me each day, especially that hard days when all I want to do is cry. He is my one and only and I would not trade him for everything (some days I don't feel that way :)). I am greatful that God blessed me with a wonderful and healthy boy who is happy. He feels a hole in my heart that no one else can. I love him so much! I can't wait to see Ayden again and know that the reunion will be great. I know that he knows how much I miss him and how much I love him! I am so glad to call him mine.